Something happened over the weekend and it shook me up inside.
Okay that’s a bit dramatic but it was one of those ‘Ah-ha’ moments Oprah Winfrey often describes.
A sudden realisation that the small people living in my house, who have been bossing me around, who I have been cleaning, feeding and screaming at for almost eight years have changed.
The same small people who make my heart ache when they hug me tight and tell me they love me more than anything, well the eldest one made me realise in one conversation that all the mundane small everyday milestones are finally paying off.
I’m sure every busy mom out there, like me, is so busy doing what needs to be done, we tend to forget that our kids are soaking up our behaviour, our words, our praise, our anger, our joy, our love, all the time.
They spend more time with us than anyone else and so we feel we know them inside and out but we forget that they also know us.
They know us better than anyone. They know how to push our buttons, what reaction they will get and lets be honest we don’t always have control in certain situations and they know it.
It’s a constant push and pull of who is winning and who is defeated depending on how stressed out or tired we are.
I was having the usual boring mom type conversation with my almost eight-year-old son, the one where he rolls his eyes because I’m complaining that he hasn’t done what I asked him to do five hundred times already.
This time we were talking about all the after school activities he does and the fact that I had to cancel his swimming lessons as they clashed with gymnastics and he is obsessed with gymnastics (I know, random!).
I told him I was worried that if he didn’t do any swimming lessons for one school term, he would forget how to swim and therefore possibly drown in the future. We live near the beach so not being able to swim isn’t ideal.
As I am a rubbish swimmer myself, I need the rest of my family to know what they are doing in the water so they can save me if needs be.
Growing up in Ireland, swimming lessons were seen as quite extravagant and the water is so cold only crazy people swim in the sea, unless it’s on Christmas Day when everyone is allowed to drink copious amounts of hot whiskeys in preparation for hypothermia.
Ryan put down his spoon and said; “Mom, I’ve noticed you worry way too much about everything. You are such a worry wart! Stop wasting so much time worrying! You even worry about worrying….just chill. I had swimming lessons for four years, I know how to swim!”
Now this doesn’t sound like a big deal but hey I’m a worrier, so it worried me. He is almost 8 and is already sounding like an adult, its awesome and terrifying at the same time.
Being astute and making valid points in a conversation is not something I factored in when I had kids. All the time I’ve been wishing they would hurry up and grow up, when toilet training, cleaning up vomit or dealing with tantrums, now I have a little dude who is telling me to chill out and stop worrying.
He also told me people living in Andorra don’t have to pay any taxes and that it takes just 56 minutes to walk the length of Monaco. I have no idea if these facts are true but either way it makes for an interesting conversation.
After eight years of feeling frazzled, being riddled with anxiety and general exhaustion it looks like having kids is finally paying off. I am beginning to reap the benefits, I’m trying not to worry as much because lets face it — he did have a point. Worrying about worrying is a complete waste of time. Good thing I have a sensible almost eight year-old on hand to sort me out!